北美考试教学中心 托福写作组 黄万竹
Only after I have given birth to my beloved daughter, did I realize what an arduous task it is to raise a child. There is no doubt that during that process, how to shape children’s personality successfully requires constant and painstaking efforts of parents and other guardians. What kind of values should be given the top priority? The answer lies in that the most significant one varies among different age groups and as far as I am concerned, being helpful turns out to be the perfect choice as for children at the age of five to ten.
Admittedly, being honest and well-organized can never be ignored during both parenting and schooling. Considering the development of children’s psychology, they are the personalities that are supposed to be emphasized the most for children under five years old and over ten respectively. According to the study of cognitive psychology, as I have read from books during pregnancy, children start to tell lies as early as two years old since at that time they begin to distinguish between the truth and what they can make up as another version. Therefore, it is rather urgent to get to know the reason why a child tells a lie and instruct him or her the more desirable solution of a problem once they begin to tell a lie. In other words, being honest should be rooted into their hearts much earlier than expected, no later than five years old from my perspective.
When it comes to being well-organized, a child can hardly arrange his or her life well enough until Grade Three in elementary school, that is to say, nine or ten years old. Based on my observation of my daughter, unless a child has possessed adequate independence and related practical ability to operate and organize, it would be nearly unrealistic to completely count on a young child no matter it is managing daily schedule, cleaning a bedroom, or deciding what clothes he or she would choose to wear today. As for my daughter at the age of eight, she still felt extremely reluctant to drop her favorite short skirt for summer wear when I told her it was nearly winter. So parents’ guidance is indispensable since young children’s cognition and psychology refrains them from organizing their life methodically.
The reason why being helpful is the most appropriate for this age group lies in two aspects. Firstly, establishing children’s own social network has been a central issue in the late period of kindergarten and early stage of elementary school. That is because when removed from parents, they desperately need identity and recognition in a new community. The most welcomed children in a class of kindergarten for example, would undoubtedly be the ones who are willing to offer help, such as picking up partners’ spoons or sharing toys. Moreover, acceptance in a group acts as an essential source of security and confidence for a young child. The second reason is linked with the cultivation of independence. I still remember since my daughter showed great interests to afford her help in the kitchen, she got to acquire the basic skill of cooking gradually since the age of six. The awareness of helping others serves to involve children into the process of daily chores, thus enhancing their independence and organization capability spontaneously step by step.
In conclusion, even though the three above mentioned personalities are all important for children, it is being helpful that ought to enjoy the highest priority in terms of five to ten years old children for the cognitive psychological and practical reasons.