作者:雅思写作组 管玲
雅思小作文流程图是很多学生头疼的一类小作文题目,在考场上遇到后大部分同学都陷入了写“小学流水帐”日记的死循环----步……,接着……,然后……,最后……。这样的方式写出来的文章,逃不出雅思小作文评分标准中5分Task Achievement中写的机械地(mechanically)描述以及GRA中“use only a limited range of structure”。因此,多样化的表达方式,才能让大家脱离这个流水账的魔爪。下面跟大家分享分享如何让大家脱离机械的魔抓,拥抱6分GRA“use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms”的要求以及7分GRA“use a variety of complex structures”的要求。
流程图的主体段写作一般写的是一个材料的加工或制作过程,比如历年考的咖啡豆的加工过程,玻璃瓶的制作过程,苹果罐头的加工过程,水泥和混泥土的制作过程等。一般描述的是先后顺序,语态一般是被动,因此首先给大家补充先后顺序的表达方式以及举例应用。
例如剑桥真题12test8流程图:地热能产电的过程
The diagram below shows how geothermal energy is used to produce electricity.
步骤中有2个动作---1)the cold water is collected; 2) the cold water is pumped down
链接这两个动词除了使用after that,next等衔接词外,还可以运用从句:
1. 时间状语从句
a) (动作1), before being done (动作2).
b) After being done(动作1), (动作2).
c) Once …(动作1), (动作2).
d) When … (动作1), (动作2).
注:主句和从句前后主语一致before/after做连词
例句如下:
a) The cold water is collected, before being pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
b) After being collected, the cold water is pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
c) Once (it is) collected, the cold water is pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
d) When (it is) collected, the cold water is pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
2. 定语从句
a) (动作1), which is followed by (动作2).
b) (动作1), after which…(动作2)
例句如下:
a) The cold water is collected, which is followed by being pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
b) The cold water is collected, after which it is pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
3. 从图中我们发现个动作水的收集是在一个容器(container)中发生的,我们可以进一步利用容器(container)这个地点,让句子更加多样化,可以使用一下句型:
The (步骤) stage starts in (动作1的地点) where/in which (动作1) before (动作2).
例句如下:
The first stage starts in a big container where cold water is collected before being pumped down to the injection well which is about 4.5km depth under the ground.
当然不仅仅是在步,只要出现地点,中间步骤也可以运用这样的句型结构,例如历年真题玻璃瓶的制作过程中:
The diagram below shows the process of glass recycling.
第二步stage2中,可以看到出现了地点cleaning plant, 于是同样可以运用以上句型表达方式:
The second stage starts in a cleaning plant, in which the recycled bottles are cleaned by high pressured water and sorted by color in green, brown and clear ones.
不仅仅是地点的出现,加工工具的出现也是可以运用以上讲解的句型结构,例如剑桥真题8Test3:
The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.
出现了mixer,rotating heater等多个加工工具,第二步主语是powder(粉末),个动作是be mixed, 第二个动作是be heated, 可以借助一个加工工具来运用以上句型:
The second stage starts from a mixer, in which the powder is mixed before being heated in the rotating heater.
这个表达我们再来看一个例题进行运用和练习:
The diagrams below show the process of applying for a driver license in America. (2018.5.19)
在这个图中,个动作发生的地点是a visiting center, 个动作是complete the iapplication form; 第二个动作是take an eyesight test, 值得注意的是这个图描绘的是拿到美国驾照的一个流程,因此在语态上用到的是主动语态,而不是一般加工工序类流程图的被动形式。按照上述句子形式,可以把两个动作连接起来,利用发生地点写出复杂句:
The first stage starts in a visiting center where the candidates complete the application forms before taking an eye test.
4. 在一些流程图中有的动作不是先后发生的,而是同时进行的,例如剑桥真题12test8流程图:地热能产电的过程中的第二步是冷水流过 (flow though/ pass though) 了geothermal zone(地热区)同时冷水被hot rocks加热 (be heated)。
一般同学们想到与此同时都是把动作1和动作2用at the same time连接,但是这样的表达是一个简单句,因此可以回顾在语法中,状语从句中引导与此同时的时间状语从句的引导词是while,于是这句话的表达也可以使用状语从句的表达:
The water is heated by the hot rocks while flowing through the geothermal zone.
以上是为大家总结的雅思小作文流程图中表达动作先后顺序以及同时发生的句型结构,掌握以上4大类句型结构,灵活多样的进行运用,和把流程图写成“流水账”的日子说拜拜吧!